Wednesday, July 28, 2004

10 Things That Would Have Made Spiderman 2 Much Better

1. Kirsten Dunst could have talked more than she screamed.
2. It could have been less predictable. Was anybody really surprised Peter Parker couldn't stop being Spiderman?
3. Yes, it's fun to have people talk about one thing when the audience really knows they're talking about something else, but don't overdo it.
4. Careful what you allude to: it took me most of the movie to remember the Green Goblin wasn't the Joker.
5. Enough with the speechifying! I don't need to learn life lessons from Aunt May, college professors, Mary Jane, Peter Parker and even Doc Oc.
6. Poetry? Get real.
7. Doc Oc didn't seem very evil. Did he actually kill anyone, or would that have ruined the PG rating?
8. Everything having to do with the landlord and his daughter could have been eliminated in the interest of time and streamlining the plot.
9. Mary Jane should have left her wedding and got to Peter's apartment to find him screwing his landlord's daughter.
10. Water probably doesn't stop fusion. Even Hudson River water.